2002-03-13 - 11:07 p.m.

I had to do something kind of strange tonight. One of my oldest friends in the world is now married to a wonderful woman and has two little kids. We've been friends since kindergarten, where on day during naptime I snuck up off my R@ggedy Ann rug and kissed him, then ran back and pretended to be sleeping. I was a shameless little hussy, back then. Anyway, he's my lifelong friend, more like a brother, really. Close to my family, big-hearted, smart-mouthed. We don't really have much in common, but we have so much history that it doesn't really matter. Anyway, he married a great woman who I really love, and she was a hairdresser and a devout Catholic, but she was very low key about it. But now, things have changed. Now he's found religion.

And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, either. But it's just so STRANGE.

I got an email from his wife, asking if I would write a letter about how my friend has supported and inspired me. Of course I said yes, and then she told me that he was going on a Christi@n Mens Retreat this weekend and needed letters, and she wanted to surprise him with one from me. I don't know how I did, I wrote it almost like I write these entries, and I didn't know how to address it, so I didn't. Weird.

I finally slept last night, and grudgingly got out of bed this morning, leaving the boyfriend entwined in the sheets, snoring. I woke him up when I was leaving, and he told me he's cutting me off the Tylenol PM. In the middle of the night, after I had inadvertently rolled myself in all the covers, he tried to roll me over and get some blankets for himself, at which point he said I grunted and growled (and he did an impression)and he was scared that if he tried to wake me I'd punch him in the mouth. Heh. I told him it had nothing to do with the Tylenol PM. I'm angry, man.

I am, actually, kind of angry, in general. I don't mean tantrum-throwing, fighting angry, it's more like a low level HUM of anger. I can easily be provoked to snarling or ranting about something important to me. Jerry, after much probing into random childhood stories, had decided that I was actually born a little bit angry. Colic and all that. He says it's leftover anger from a past life. I don't know if I buy that, but it'd be a handy excuse if I did. 'I'm sorry I bitch-slapped you, but I have some otherworldly steam to release.'

Oh, and Becky? Just for the record, I didn't PARTAKE of the recreation, I just FOUND it. It is work, after all.

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