2002-04-18 - 7:42 p.m.
There is a very funny guy in my office. He's of mixed Asian descent, and is a big flaming queen. I mean, that's his persona, he cultivates it. Wears Pr@da shoes and obscenely expensive clothes, speaks in a heavily accented singsong, and gossips about how everyone in the office dresses. When I first met him, I HATED him. I thought he was so mean, making catty comments about how people look, and he was doing it in my office once and I involuntarily snorted. And he turned around, wearing $500 jeans and a L0uis Vuitt0n belt, and said, "Whaaaat? Are you afraid I'm going to talk about YOU?" And I laughed and told him he was under the mistaken impression that I gave a shit what he thought. And now, I know him and I see that it's just his act, not who he is. And he's hysterical.He lives in my neighborhood, and we were talking about it, and he said that he was out on his street and some tourists walked by with a guidebook, and stopped outside a historic brownstone. One read, " This is the jewel of Perry Street.." And this guy interrupted her and said, "Excuse me, sweetie, but I'M the jewel of Perry Street."
Anyway, I told him about the apartment and he asked me what I was doing with mine, and told me that he'd like to look at it to sublet, for a year. He's going to come look at it next week, but I don't think my ONE tiny little closet will be nearly big enough for his precious wardrobe. Did I ever tell you about closet? That's right, singular. ONE lonely closet in this whole place, and it's a small one. It currently contains all my fall shoes, 4 pairs of J@ck Purce11s, my flip flops, and the new sandals I just bought. All my clothes, my coats, my vacuum cleaner, rolls of wrapping paper, umbrellas, phone books, extra toilet paper, 3 sets of sheets, my accordian file of papers, and an Aerobed. It's a goddamn feat of heroism to get anything out of there. It's amazing I can even get dressed.
So I won't miss that.
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