2002-04-25 - 11:39 p.m.

We still haven't signed the apartment lease, and I've realized that my coworker and our new boss are NOT going to get along, and I just decided not to go out with the boyfriend and his friends, and and and. Nothing big, just nagging loose ends.

I went out for drinks after work with a bunch of my friends/colleagues, and got involuntarily involved in Maria's boyfriend drama, and spent the last two hours frantically signaling her and reminding her of valid points while she fought/broke up with her boyfriend. Now, I know better than this. If there's one thing you don't want to witness, it's a good friend of yours fighting with her boyfriend. You hear way too many things you never wanted to hear. Also, I of course ended up taking her side, which could always come back and bite me in the ass when/if they make up. I know better, yet there I was. I'm just not myself, I tell you.

Also, Jerry told me tonight that it's clear to him that abovementioned co worker is very threatened and suspicious of me, and that she joined us for drinks tonight hoping to get some indication of whether I was friend or foe. And you know what? I'm fucking TIRED. I'm tired of that shit, I've done nothing but bend over backwards to assuage her insecurity, and to help her when she's overwhelmed. I decided early on that I would let her be, that she'd hang her ownself sooner or later. I tried to be diplomatic and helpful to her, but really, she can just bite me at this point. I hated to have that pointed out to me, I'm sick and tired of that senseless crap.

And the last thing I wanted to do after all that shit was go out to a CLUB. At 11 o'clock, no less. So now I'm home and crabby and I'm going to bed.

And I'm going to ignore the petty spiteful temptation to lock the boyfriend out tonight.

Oh, and one more very big thing. I cannot BELIEVE that the V@tican stopped short of a zero-tolerance policy. I was a lapsed Catholic before, but now I'm officially fallen. How dare they?

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