2005-05-06 - 4:22 p.m.

I have been thoroughly enjoying staying home with the baby, brain melt nonwithstanding. The weather has been fabulous, so we've been out walking every day, which is good for my mental health. And although these early days are Baby Jail, for the most part The Warden is pretty cooperative, and I even spent three hours (Three hours!) sitting outside at D@ Silv@n0 with my friend last week while he slept blissfully in his carriage - all the way through dessert and coffee.

I spend hours just staring at him, marveling that THIS is what was in my giant belly, this tiny little perfect human being, and it just blows my mind, still. He's getting big fast, and looks just like his daddy, but with my coloring. He's a perfect little angel most of the time, too, sleeping for at least four or five hour stretches at night since we brought him home (thank you, whoever is in charge of these things) so I haven't suffered much sleep deprivation - and other than a couple of cranky hours in the early evening, he doesn't even cry much. The husband has also been amazing, far more hands on than I expected him to be.

And, as the mother of a boy (mother! how the hell am I someone's mother?) I found out the hard way that speed is of the essence when diaper changing. On our very first week home, I lifted his little butt up to slide the diaper under him when he started peeing all over - I laughed about it - until I glanced up and saw the drops of wetness ON HIS POOR LITTLE BABY FOREHEAD. Then I almost cried, convinced I was the worst mother ever. I let my baby pee in his own face! The horror! Since then, of course, I've gotten over it, since he's also pooped through his diaper AND my jeans, peed all over me, and just this morning threw up right in my face.
Ah, the glamour.

Maybe tomorrow I'll regale you with the joys of breastfeeding.

Ok, I'm off to go stare at my boy while he sleeps.

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